TeamDavis

musings on marriage, faith and life

My Shadow June 26, 2009

Filed under: around the house,Parenthood — hokiecaryn @ 9:15 am
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This morning Josiah and I had a most glorious little stroll through the neighborhood. It has been so ghastly outside in recent weeks and it’s been hard having a baby who loves to be outside and not wanting to go. But this morning, we took a nice stroll. There was a bit of a cool breeze, the puffy white clouds were moving quickly by in the beautiful Florida sky. I guess it’s only about 80. Now, before Florida, hearing it’d be 80 degrees at 8 in the morning would have turned me off. But after what the last couple of weeks have been like, that was refreshingly cool! So we enjoyed it.

shadow

Image: Bygosh.com

Josiah has found his shadow. I think he’s seen shadows for a long time…even when he was a little lump that would just lay there in my lap while we were outside in the mornings to keep him from crying. I think he saw our shadow against the wall. Anyway, this morning, the whole world was going on around him, and he focused behind us on his shadow the whole time (well, in front of us on the first leg because of where the sun was!).

I remembered a poem from Robert Lewis Stevenson’s “Child’s Garden of Verses” from growing up. So I thought I’d share 2 verses in honor of Josiah liking to watch his shadow.

The child in the poem is somewhat annoyed by the shadow’s “stickiness”, but I know a child would say this and secretly be thankful for a friend who sticks so close. In some ways, Josiah has become our little shadow; mostly mine during the days. But he is so fascinated with Scott now and watching everything he does. I know he’ll be trying to imitate and emulate him as soon as is possible. Right now he’s just soaking it in.

Like our little shadow.

I have a little shadow that goes in and out with me,
And what can be the use of him is more than I can see.
He is very, very like me from the heels up to the head;
And I see him jump before me, when I jump into my bed.

The funniest thing about him is the way he likes to grow–
Not at all like proper children, which is always very slow;
For he sometimes shoots up taller like an india-rubber ball,
And he sometimes goes so little that there’s none of him at all…

- My Shadow By Robert Louis Stevenson

See the full poem here, or of course, in the collection “Child’s Garden of Verses

 

Ageism in Hollywood June 23, 2009

philadelphiastory

Philadelphia dilema...which man? imdb

Scott and I really enjoy watching old classic movies.  Sometimes they’re hard to get into, but we have found a lot of really great stories among them.  For example, we just finished The Philadelphia Story with Katherine Hepburn, James Stewart and Cary Grant; it is probably one of our favorites.

The wit of the character’s dialog, the creativity of the plot unfolding, maybe the complexity of a mystery, and the dynamic interaction between the characters carry the film more than a lot of movies today.  Movies today are much more complex in set, filming, number of characters, scenery, and of course special effects, etc.  But many are not written as well as some of these somewhat simply filmed, small cast movies.  It’s really amazing.  I think the actors had to be much better, too, to pull off the movie, because their interaction and dialog carries the film more than flashy things of today’s movies.

Also, I love that many of the movies were either literary pieces and or stage productions before they went to film.  I believe that this brings much more depth and profundity to the dialog and story of these movies.  It seems like when something is written for the screen, it may fall more flat, one-dimensional.

These aren’t surprises to many film buffs and classic-lovers.  And I won’t go on and on about comparing to modern film.  There are of course many modern films that are wonderfully orchestrated.  I just feel like my brain is challenged watching older movies; like I increase my IQ some, and enjoy subtle, smart humor that requires at times intelligence to even be able to laugh at.

But one thing that really stood out to me in the past couple of movies we watched was how old movies (classic, black and white films) seem to have no issue with casting old people, how older people are a normal integral part of their portrayal of society.  Not to mention many of the people in these films look very NORMAL; not completely plasticy and made up beyond recognition.

I can think of a handful of films that include men and women in their 60s plus that are integrated into the story.  But it’s rarely done now in the same subtle way that it is done in the classic movies.  Also, if they are older, they don’t have to look gorgeous and like they’re 20 years younger than they are.  It’s fine for them to just look like people
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4 Month Old Highlights and Happy Father’s Day June 22, 2009

Filed under: around the house,family,Parenthood — hokiecaryn @ 3:56 pm
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100_6624_edWell, it was a banner weekend in many ways for Josiah. His sleep goes well, and then regresses some, but this weekend he did two nights with consistent long stretches of sleep, which was really nice; probably the best sleep we’ve been able to get so far.

He also over the weekend became much more deliberate in grabbing things. He’d grabbed hold of rings on the bouncy chair for a while now (since May when we were at my parent’s house and got this new bouncy seat), but it was almost like he was able to grasp half-heartedly.  For the first time, I saw him really plan, reach out and grab hold of something, and keep grasping on.

He also has become much more rolly! He’s rolling around and can move around in a circle, but not like rolling over yet. he pulls his legs up, and moves them, kind of throwing his weight, and can manage to move like the hands on a clock kind of in a circle.

The negative is that he’s all OVER the crib. I’ll put him down, and he’ll inch around like an inch worm and end up in all kinds of positions. Definitely had to make the crib very baby proof where as before he wasn’t mobile really. He has almost laughed a couple times when I was playing with him in the mornings, but it was almost like I wasn’t sure.

Sunday he laughed as Scott had him “flying” in the air some. Which was also new that he let us do that…not so sensitive to that 100_6675_edfalling feeling. He loved it and we’re pretty sure a little giggle came out!

This morning, I hadn’t heard a peep from him (VERY unusual) so I went in after waiting a while, and found him happy and awake.  I found something though that petrified me and I almost screamed.  In the dark, he appeared with a ring of dark fluid around his head which in the dark I assumed was blood and I was frantic and almost screamed, but he was wide eyed, happy and smiling up at me. I paused, flipped on the light and realized it was poop all OVER the place. But he was okay. Gosh, that was scary.  I wasn’t even upset about cleaning it up because I was so grateful he was okay!

He’s just growing up so much. it’s quite amazing. So, I know there are many more steps to go, and that we can go backwards sometimes and then forward again. But it was very exciting to see these big highlights all around the same time, and to celebrate Father’s Day and his 4 month b’day! he’s also been VERY interested in Scott especially the last week, watching his every move when he’s home. He likes hearing him talk, and watching him do anything — drink, eat, shave, whatever. It’s very fun to see him take so much interest in his daddy.  A very fun weekend all around for Father’s day and celebrating nearly his 4 month birthday!

 

Enjoying the moments June 5, 2009

Filed under: family,Parenthood — hokiecaryn @ 10:22 am
Tags: , ,

So, since we’ve had Josiah out in public, people are always looking at him adoringly and saying how they LOVE that stage — 100_6463_blogsizenewborn/infant.  Often this comes to us after a long night, or a difficult no-sleeping day, so it’s hard for us to believe.  The hours of crying and fussing and unable to console our child leaves us bedraggled and sleep-less.  It’s hard to sense that someone could LONG for those days.

But, I know that’s not what they mean.

They mean the cuddling stage, the small little bundle of joy in your arms keeping you cozy and loved feeling.  The gazes from your infant into your eyes with the boundless and unconditional love for you.  The smiles, the giggles, and the warm naps on your shoulder.  Those things are precious.

Josiah is almost 16 weeks old, and he’s in 6 month clothes, and he’s becoming much more active and fun.  There have been much better days of sleep and naps, and we’re excited for progress.  He loves being able to stretch his legs and stand up, or sit up right (still needs help, but he doesn’t like lying down anymore).  We jokingly say he’s done being a baby and speak for him saying “that bouncy seat is for babies…I don’t need to be in that anymore.”  Just the other day, as he was falling asleep in my arms on a good day, I gazed down at him and had this flash forward moment and started crying realizing that soon he’d be wanting to walk around, and would be squirming out of my arms all the time to investigate and explore.

I realize that relatively soon, this stage will be over; I really do need to enjoy it while it lasts.  He’s no longer the sleepy little eating-pooping-warm-blob that he kind of was for the first few weeks.  He’s becoming more independent (relatively, of course) and chatty with goos and coos.  He’s still clingy enough, and still can’t handle sitting on his own all the time.So I really want to and need to embrace the moments while I have them.

It’s a little easier on good days.  But when I have a “good day”, I notice that he’s happier, and generally more independent and I can put him down and get some things done.  Looking back on that in this reflection, I realize those “good days” will become more frequent and we wont’ be in the cuddly stage quite so much.  So I don’t plan to coddle him or anything, but just I don’t want to be looking so far ahead to the next thing that I do miss out on this stage, even if some parts of it have been and continue to be extremely difficult.

In good news, he slept almost 12 hrs last night — 7:30 pm – 7:30 am.  Not perfectly, and there were times he woke up crying, sometimes to eat.  He fussed and squirmed and woke himself up with his sad little gas and such.  But really, it was quite a miracle and like what the books tell you they should be doing around 4 months.

So I have hope that we are making progress, and that we’ll see delightful changes.  But as the first 3 months slip into memory, I’m actually starting to have some moments of missing them.  It is weird.  Someday I’ll probably be telling someone that I miss that stage as they hold a few week old in their arm.  I guess it’s the grace of God to help us lose memory of the difficulty and cling to the joys.  Not everyone will; not everyone can.  But I know that God has this built in so we’ll keep having kids!

Anyway, so trying to savor the moments.  I’m realizing how much attitude affects my parenting, and I am glad I have some time to be trained in patience and endurance for the long run.

 

 
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