Josiah & his mom at 3 weeks
Today is Josiah’s three-week birthday! I guess the time does go quickly, although when your hours are broken into about 3 hr time blocks of eating and sleeping (including through the night), the days do tend to feel long. We are still enjoying the precious moments with our baby, and the crying and fussing has become a bit more tolerable as we are getting more sleep and I believe it is somewhat lessening at least in the wee hours of the morning when it’s definitely harder to take.
Most mornings this past week, I have taken time with Josiah to sit on the porch for about an hour and enjoy the coolish Florida mornings with him. He seems to most often like being out there, a gentle breeze, our wind chimes chiming, and the birds singing; an occasional other noise that he tries to listen to. It’s a special time and as I’m more of me each day, I am really trying to enjoy those times and take time to talk with him.
Today I was pondering how much our life has changed in three weeks. There are so many aspects of our life that have changed since the birth of our son.
Three Weeks Ago:
- I had never been through childbirth
- I had never held my first child at 15-seconds-old in my arms; or known such love for a purple wriggly 9 lbs of human
- I had never known what it would feel like to nurse a human being from my body
- I never understood the true meaning of “recovery” from childbirth
- I did not understand all that was loaded behind the phrase “sleepless nights” with a newborn
- I had never loved someone so much at first sight
- I did not know how lovely every square inch of my son’s precious body would be to me
- I did not realize how quickly and easily it was to brush off being peed and pooped on at the same time
- [warning: nursing reference] I did not know the frustration and agony of engorgement and sitting in a puddle of my own milk, crying because nursing was so painful
CUTE!
- I did not believe the painfulness of nursing would slowly wane and I would find more rhythm and ability in it
- I did not know how strong and yet how weak a newborn really is
- I had not yet experienced the utter joy of seeing my husband lovingly gaze at our son
- I had not yet experienced the pride in seeing my son in the arms of my own mother and father; and witnessing their complete joy over him
- I did not know how much I would want to chew on my baby’s cute little chubby cheeks
- I did not realize how much I take for granted in my daily freedom before our high-needs infant came into my responsibility
- I did not know how much I was willing to relinquish my comfort and freedom for my son
- I did not know the depth and strength that it would take to be a mother
- I did not know the honor of stepping into the circle of mothers in history who have bravely traipsed into the land of raising children
- I did not understand the immensity of the calling three weeks ago.
Three weeks ago, I was completely unaware of the joy that would be mine today, despite adversity and difficulty and pain.
